The Dope Box TV Blog

This week continues the patient plotlines from last week. Will Bailey’s pet patient get his organs? Will McDreamy become so frazzled by “Prisoner Death Row” that he improperly mousses his hair? Will Izzie become pregnant with a half-ghost child? Let’s find out…

9:01 - Is there anything worse than being teased by a serial killer? Oh. Being killed by one. Right.

9:01 - Sure, PDR joyfully mocks Derek’s dreamy blue eyes and sea of dark locks now. But we all suffer when McDreamy doesn’t clock enough beauty sleep.

9:02 - Hot chicks and Jell-O. I guess even throat-slitting murderers have cliché fantasies.

9:02 - While I marvel at the chiseled physique of McSteamy, I can’t help but wonder…what’s up with his tomato-like complexion?

9:03 - Condoms in the cookie jar? Nookie and a cookie. Uncouth storage calamity saved by rhyming!

9:04 - If someone peed on your couch cushion wouldn’t you just throw it away?

9:05 - I could never trust a doctor in a pink scrunchy. It also makes Meredith resemble a sullen pony.

9:06 - Short dude looks like he got in a leg-wrestling match with a robot spider.

9:08 - “You’re mad at me because I killed those women. I get that.”

9:09 - Kid needs some organs, soon-to-be-dead murderer wants to donate. It’s highly implausible kismet!

9:11 - Either Meredith is uncomfortable around mothers or she’s summoning the rain gods.

9:13 - Hunt finally asks Yang out on a date. Also commands her to perform an enema on a stranger.

9:14 - “I’ve got a body full of high-quality parts here.”

9:16 - Now, I’m no psychoanalyst, but I think the little guy has an issue with being short.

9:20 - A few tidbits on Dr. McHeelys (Arizona): Likes Sprite, would be super happy about an organ delivery service, and clearly doesn’t recognize a “shut-up-and-let-me-pretend-to-be-asleep” tone when she hears one.

9:21 - Eating pork roast and being grilled about dead mom and abusive alky dad? I’d rather run and play with a serial killer too.

9:22 - Tator tots! Woot!

9:23 - Isn’t there an age limit on drinking a juice box in public?

9:24 - Dr. McHeelys is a little cavalier about yanking the organs out of a dead kid.

9:24 - Jokes about brain herniation causing delirium are way funny.

9:25 - They still hang people? Who would choose neck-breaking over lethal injection?

9:30 - Holy inappropriate face-grabbing!

9:31 - I’m continually amazed by the ability of the Seattle Grace docs to compare their own troubles with those of their patients, regardless of any actual similarities. When operating on short guy, Callie prattles on about how “humiliation makes you shorter.” It’s not easy to equate being abandoned by a lesbian lover to disfigurement caused by a failed bone-lengthening.

9:32 - McHeelys is callous as a self-preservation tactic. Must she bring up tiny coffins, though?

9:34 - Yang has a girlie little bounce around Hunt. “So what was your best surgery ever?” Cristina and Meredith are definitely not good at being Izzie-like.

9:35 - Der yells and Mer to sign PDR’s surgery permission slip. Uncool.

9:41 - Kid will be intestine-free for 24 hours? Aren’t they dragging this out a little too much? Obviously, PDR is going to donate his organs.

9:43 - Only a true friend will tell you when your ponytail is overly-elevated. Looks like Cristina took the first step towards healing the rift with Meredith.

9:45 - My shorter little brother kept me from playing varsity basketball too! No, wait…it was my inability to run without wheezing and phobia of jerseys.

9:46 - McDreamy saving PDR means he can’t donate organs to kid. Which would mean they both end innocent lives for their own agendas, making the comparison between them valid. Although I understand the desire to punish PDR for the evil acts he committed, I don’t think it matters whether he dies in the hospital or on a prison table. Plus, tax payers foot the bill for his medical procedures. I mean, if he were real. Got me again, suspension of disbelief!

9:51 - What not to say to prospective mother-in-law: 1). “I’ve totally been faking my emotional stability.” 2). “I just can’t help it. I love me some serial killers!” 3). “I like to eat paste.” Well, at least she skipped number 3.

9:53 - Breaking up with dead guys is hard. Denny’s teary eyes partially thawed my frozen, black heart.

9:54 - Late, dapper, and drunk. That’s a dating scenario I’m familiar with.

9:56 - “You see things in black and white. Meredith doesn’t. You need a spoonful of that. You need her. She’s the one.”

9:57 - Hunt laid on a gutted soldier for 2 hours to stop the bleeding? I want to have his babies.

9:58 - I would totally get in the shower too. Emotionally wounded men are hot.

9:59 - Wait, if Denny is Izzie’s hallucination then why is he sitting on the bed with Alex after Izzie left the room? Are we to believe he’s a real ghost?

10:01 - The sound of someone’s head bashing against a hospital bed frame? Not as pleasant as one might imagine.

“You’re wearing an alarmingly high pony tail.” -Derek

9:00 - Does it really count if you wish on an air vent?

9:01 - McDreamy and Meredith all snuggled up (very sweet). It’s been a nice change of pace to see them as a stable, functional couple for so long. Mer’s request for a quickie? Cute, but people who find sex energizing puzzle me. It’s soporific, like a Thanksgiving turkey feast.

9:02 - PDR = “Prisoner, Death Row” (cue dramatic techno music). Hunt seems rather unimpressed. Being a doctor in a warzone prepares one for just about anything, I suppose. Derek, on the other hand, looks as if he’s just found a fingernail in his salad.

9:03 - What a cordial murderer. “You have a lovely voice.”

9:03 - PDR compares being a serial killer with being a doctor. Ooo, burn!

9:04 - Who hasn’t broken a couple fingers doing yoga?

9:06 - Sick kid has the forethought to snatch the lollipops before his doctor hits the ground. Nicely done.

9:09 - Oh, Izzie. Such a dilemma. Hot alive dude or hot dead dude? Denny is right, though. Telling Alex about all the posthumous or hallucinatory sex they’re having is a monumentally bad idea. Also awkward to inject into a conversation.

9:12 - “She violated me with the nakedness.” Both Callie and Sloan are having trouble resisting interns. Apparently being groomed like a monkey is a big turn on for Callie, who gets all stammer-y when Sadie picks lint out of her hair. Sloan tells Lexi she can watch the surgery but “no touching anything.” Seriously. The worst teaching hospital ever.

9:13 - Heelys! I hope Dr. Arizona takes those off when armed with a scalpel.

9:14 - Sheesh. I guess Derek and PDR won’t be braiding each other’s hair anytime soon.

9:19 - I think we can all assume what he did was pretty bad. Death row ain’t for shoplifters.

9:19 - So, Hunt is unaffected by a battered death row patient, but the bickering of Christina/Meredith makes him raise his eyebrows in amused bewilderment?

9:20 - A). Alex’s grandmother appeared in a dream to tell him not to fiddle with his junk? B). “Tell him I said hi”?!? Alex is definitely too comfortable with crazy.

9:21 - Next week on Grey’s Anatomy: Yang stabs Grey in the spinal column with a toothbrush shank.

9:22 - Sick kid is campaigning hard. I think, even if he isn’t dying, he deserves a wish after 12 bowel resectionings.

9:24 - Broken bones patient is irritating. Here’s hoping she breaks her jaw next so she can’t shout “Come on!” anymore.

9:28 - “You thought Shepherd was just a haircut, you didn’t like Hahn, and you think Dr. Sloan is a hussy. Can you name any attending you thought was good?”

9:29 - Hunt ignored Yang when they first got the PDR case; now he brings her coffee? He may be a little douche-y but his orange beard is hott (note the additional t).

9:31 - Callie’s relationship record: Impulsive marriage to George, who slept with Izzie on the sly; Nouveau lesbian experiment with Dr. Hahn; Friends with benefits sexy-time with Sloan. These people are aware that there are datable humans outside the hospital, right?

9:31 - Mocking the bouncy house? Blasphemous!

9:34 - It’s important to consider alliteration when plotting the death of others.

9:42 - I sense a bromance blooming between Hunt and Shepherd.

9:43 - “I’d rather you fantasized about me…or chicks. But whatever.” A totally normal reaction to the news that his girlfriend is fucking a ghost.

9:43 - Uh, is Alex pleasuring Izzie to make Dead Denny jealous?

9:45 - As my gift to you on this the day of your birth, I bequeath an open, multi-dimension relationship.

9:46 - Why is Bailey being stupid? Get the boy some new intestines!

9:47 - I don’t think Hunt is hot/cold on purpose to play mind games. I think he’s just naturally abrasive and unable to be consistently sensitive to others. Sound like someone we know?

9:54 - I will not cry. I will not cry. Damn you, GA writers!

9:56 - I knew Sloan would give in. He is a hussy, after all. I wonder if downing shots and gnawing on the straw means Callie plans to make a move on Sadie.

9:58 - Poignant, uncannily related, personal anecdote revealed! Derek hates killers cuz his dad was shot by a watch thief. Meredith reacts to the tragic tale by furrowing her brow and saying: “Sorry, just a bad day all around, I guess.”

9:59 - McDreamy’s goofy faces and hoe-down moves are enough to cheer up even the most self-absorbed whiner (*cough* Meredith *cough*).

10:00 - I guess I’m hard to please, but I wouldn’t be delighted by the prospect of birthday cake with “funny” tasting innards. No matter how “okay” the frosting may be.